But these days, it's disturbing to see that most couples, few years into their marriage the closeness they share begins to wear off and they are like two strangers living together just because they are married.
This is not in anyway what God, the author of marriage intended or expected from a loving couple. Couple are to be each other best friend. You are to love, cherish, adore, respect and honour each other. Marriage is not just about co-habiting and bearing of children. It's about companionship, being there for each other at all times and bringing up children in a close knitted family build on love, trust, respect and understanding.
Your marriage is your shield and your spouse should be a source of joy and hope to you. They are to make you look forward to each day with smile and great expectations in your heart. And you can only enjoy such benefits when you share a deep friendship with them.
BUILDING A CLOSE FRIENDSHIP WITH YOUR SPOUSE
Having a close friendship with your spouse demands you love, respect and honour them as you do to yourself. To see them as a part of you. It demands that you always remember you have been fused together and thereby they are a part of you. With this in your mind, you won't do to them what you can't allowed to be done to you. You will treat them as you treat yourself.
How you treat your spouse will determine the type of friendship they will give you in return. Your attitude to them will lay the foundation for the kind of friendship they will give back whether good or bad.
Friendship with your spouse means showing them that you really love and care for them and how important they are to you not just by telling them. Let them know that they are your number one priority after God even before the kids.
Your spouse shouldn't be competing for that number one position in your life. They must know that you love, honour and respect them if you want them to act out their proper role as your spouse and the love of your life.
Deep friendship between couple goes beyond emotional closeness and connectedness. It involves being able to stand before each other naked physically, emotional, psychological, spiritually, and not be ashamed.
Until you can stand before your spouse naked in all things and not ashamed then you are yet to be in a true friendship with them. If you can't be free or open and vulnerable before your spouse then you still need to spice up your relationship.
Because as your spouse, he/ she should be your best friend, your number one fan who you can tell everything without hidding anything. Your partner should be the first person you call upon in good time and bad time. Your spouse should be someone who cares, trust, support your dreams and believes in you. Someone whose company you desire and never get tired of.
If you can't make your spouse your best friend, that simply means you have both got something hidden. In your partner you've got a friend, a lover, a confidant, a supporter and believer in your course. A willing shoulder to cry on, someone who senses your struggles and pain and shares in your low and high. A shield in time of trouble, a mouth to laugh with and a listening ear to all your blabbings.
Deep friendship in marriage builds your self confidence. It helps to ease the pain of everyday living and help couple spruce each other up. With the right friendship in place, you have the power to positively influence your spouse, helping them to be at their best, empowering and correcting them with love. Couple act as reflective mirror to each other.
With the right friendship in place, every pain becomes bearable. An unexplainable bond is created and both long for each other's company. It strengthen your marriage. Your marriage is strengthened when you can easily and openly communicate your love to each other.
Deep friendship minimize conflicts in marriage. Every disagreement is meant to unite you since both of you know you are fighting toward a common goal.
Spend quality time with your spouse. Create time for them out of your busy schedules. Engage in the activities they love doing and get to know what's going on in their life. Be there to satisfy their every need and let them know you really care.
Shower them with affection and attention and never be judgemental when they share their pain and joy with you. Never stop letting them know how much they mean to you and how grateful you are to have them in your life.
-Alasake
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